Rejection: the rejecting of something or somebody. Or the fact of being rejected
“I pray that former rejection and deep hurts will not colour what I see and hear now.”Sue Augustine
We all want to somehow feel a part of something; feel wanted, approved of and accepted. Human nature is programmed thus. The truth of the matter is we cannot get away from it. Our expectations and hopes so often ride on approval and heartache ensues when circumstances do not feed this into our fragile egos. With rejection comes the shaking of our self esteem sometimes to the core. We can become bitter and angry or withdraw and avoid similar situations in the future. It isn’t easy to give yourself a pep-talk, dust yourself off and move on. There are things that need to be worked out first. All the why me’s, where did I go wrong’s, I should have done it differently, am I not good enough’s all run through our head and we try to make sense of it all. We have all been there and are still going to go through it.
One thing that we can console ourselves with is the knowledge that things will improve as situations change. We learn as we stumble. We grow stronger as we negotiate through the pain. Our grazed knees will heal and we will stand tall again having learned lessons we might have not enjoyed yet are better off in the long run. I have been through the mill time and time again, yet still have the unquenchable yearning to take the next step. Undeniably I have been hurt, rejected, felt lost and unwanted. There are no guarantees that it will not happen again tomorrow.
You too have been through tough times I’m sure. Life doesn’t offer sunshine and roses every day. Have you felt that you have been destroyed and thrown away? Are you in the midst of a situation where you have lost your strength and courage to carry on? What was it that shook your world and made you feel worthless? Could it be that job you were turned down for? Is your relationship on shaky ground, are you still reeling from a childhood that was loveless? Are you sad for you feel unloved and misunderstood by friends and family? When you accept that past rejection is just that – past?
Take heart my dearest readers, for there is a splendid, wonderful person underneath all that rejection you are feeling now. If you can just sit a while and look at things in a different light. There must be something that you are grateful for, something that still makes you smile and gives you hope. Write them down each night and read them in the morning to start your day. Slowly you will regain your esteem and courage to face another day. Remember that each situation was unique to its own set of circumstances. You did your best then with the information you had at hand. Those that hurt you, rejected you, were only doing what was best for them at the time. It was their reality and their values that they were being true to. It had nothing to do with you in fact. It is time to gather your own set of values that are true to you and move on. It will not be easy by any means, but it does offer you a tool for the future. We can reframe all the rejection and hurt and see it as a step towards a new tomorrow that is brighter. New day, new opportunity, new people, new frame of reference, new set of circumstances