I have not yet come to the conclusion whether a little white lie is acceptable or not. Heres the thing: its the little white lies, the small cover-ups that, should they be found out, sow that little seed of uncertainty in others. Everyone wants to know that they can trust you, and of course you want them to, dont you? Oh yes we can side step the truth, tell others that THEY misunderstood - but I assure you that unless you are lying to a moron, these lies will be found out. The little nuances, body language, lilt in the voice or the answer that comes too quickly tell their own story.
Professional liars, narcissists, sociopaths have the skill of making us believe their lies. I have been caught myself many times. Im not blaming myself - hey they know their trade! Super sales people I tell you. They will sell the road to hell just to save face. We unfortunately assume people will treat us with respect and honesty if we treat them same. Truth is a snake is a snake is a snake. They will always bite you, its what they do.
Adept as experienced liars are at covering the truth, it saddens me that they feel the need to continue. Its as if their self esteem will not allow them to just be free to be themselves. Now, even though I can understand the behaviour and accept that once it has become second nature it can form part of their personality, the question remains: will they change? I suppose not.........
Do you know what is shocking? The fact that 80% of communication is not with words! So heres a little tip - if it doesnt feel right, it usually isnt. (its that little inner voice that talks softly that you should be listening to). If you get vibes or pick up a little lie, investigate first before you challenge. Sooner or later the truth will surface and then you will be able to decide what to do about it.
My experience is that small lies lead to bigger lies lead to so many lies that the liar will eventually get caught in his / her own web of deception.